When To Get Out of Medicine If You’re Unhappy
When to get out of medicine is a choice that plagues a number of medical students who are completely unhappy in medical school. I went through the same questions and decisions, particularly starting around the end of second year and into my junior rotations.
This might be one of the toughest decisions you’ll ever make, and for good reason. Many students have accumulated large debts, and every student has made the sacrifice of their time to get where they are today. Those are huge factors. In addition, many students have families to support, and finding meaningful employment that will allow loan payback as well as funds for supporting the lifestyle of their family is scary to say the least.
These were some of the issues that I was faced with just a few years ago. Believe me when I say that I know what you’re going through. Every day you wake up to dread going into the hospital while you have these worries piled up on top of that. I won’t lie about it either, I went through one of the largest episodes of depression due to thinking about these things on a daily basis. I didn’t talk about it on this blog at the time, because I thought I was too proud. Instead, I vented through other more entertaining posts. But this is a real issue, and something that many students deal with on a daily basis. It needs to be addressed.
As somebody who has already gone through all of this, here is what I recommend that you do:
1. Stick It Out
First and foremost, the ultimate goal when dealing with the question of when to get out of medicine is to keep as many doors open as possible. Quitting medical school outright closes a very big door. Yes, it sucks to be miserable but remember that the bulk of your misery will be concentrated during your junior year. Your senior year will be much better, which leads me to the next point.
2. Try Alternative Specialties
During your fourth year electives, take this time to evaluate “alternative” specialties that you didn’t get to experience as part of your core rotation schedule during your junior year. For example, rotate through a Child and Adolescent Psych month or do a month of Pathology. You never know what you may find that will appeal to you. Just because you hated your surgery rotation doesn’t mean you’ll hate something else. Some of these specialties are actually “undiscovered gems” that might give you the lifestyle and amount of free time that you are looking for.
3. What If That Doesn’t Work?
Quite possibly, you may find that nothing in medicine appeals to you. That’s OK, too. However, by finishing school you’ve left the door open as a “fall back” plan. Some people might discredit you for “falling back” on medicine with some hogwash about you being a good doctor and all of that. Don’t listen to it. You are looking out for you and your family, and that’s all that matters. If that involves falling back on medicine, than so be it.
4. Try Alternative Careers
OK, if you’ve taken the path so far and have found that medicine isn’t for you now is the time to try alternative careers. After graduating from medical school, jump into alternative employment and try to discover your niche. This can involve furthering your education through graduate degrees. It may take you a year, or it may take you three. The idea is to discover if alternative employment is really for you. If you find that it is, then you’re at the end of the road and you’ve made your decision. If not, however, there are still options.
5. Falling Back
Remember when I said that finishing school is important? Here’s where that comes into play. If you ultimately decide that alternative employment isn’t for you, or you weren’t able to find a job that pays enough to support your lifestyle and family, now is the time to re-enter the match and find a specialty that is the most tolerable for you. By finishing school, you’ve kept this door wide open. Take what information you learned via rotating through your specialties of choice during your senior electives, and pick the “lesser of the evils.”
It may not be the most desirable choice, but it gets the job done. Remember, there is no shame in medicine as a fall back career choice.
Follow The Steps
By following the above steps, you can alleviate some of the fears that you may have regarding when to get out of medicine and finding employment that will support loan repayment and maintenance of your lifestyle.
This decision cycle was designed so that it gives you the flexibility to discover alternatives to medicine while at the same time allowing you to re-enter medicine as a last-ditch resort if needed.
Also remember this: if you drop out before finishing med school, you will not have the MD after your name. This may seem trivial when you hate everything about your life, but consider the fact that several years ago (way pre-med school) I held the exact same job with my BA (in SOCIOLOGY, I might add), that a colleague of mine did who had dropped out of med school. Talk about a waste.
Just having that graduate degree will open up new doors for you in the non-medical world. You will enter the job market in business at the 100K level rather than at the 50K level to start, with most likely more interesting work.
I never realised this was such a big problem…I thought I was the only one who realised he’s not crazy about medicine (well, at my University it seems so anyway, especially since everyone else seems to be an overly keen gunner with glasses as thick as the Biochemistry textbooks they’re constantly buried in). Unfortunately dropping out doesn’t seem like an option over here, despite the fact that I’ve suddenly realised that hey, maybe all those relatives warning me off medicine and urging me to do law instead may have been on to something back there.
So what, your advice is basically to stick with it and try and find some area of medicine you love? Sound advice actually.
Kickass blog, by the way. I absolutely love the design.
Thanks Medic. Yeah, the best advice that I can give (and the only advice I can give based on the route that I took) is to stay the course and at least finish medical school.
Then, if you’re not happy in medicine once you finish school, look for alternatives. If those alternatives don’t work out, then you can always go back to medicine and try to match into the most tolerable specialty available.
MDGirl – The M.D. after your name certainly has its benefits. I’ve found that just having that, however, doesn’t necessarily make students shoe-ins for particular jobs. As you mentioned, the graduate degrees do go a long way for getting those jobs as well.
Great post. I’m an M3 and am wondering what on earth will happen if I never find something in medicine that really intrigues me. It really sucks to be slogging along without knowing for sure why you are doing it!
I really like your blog – it’s great.
Peanut, I feel your pain. I completed all of medical walking in the dark. It sucks to see your classmates all hyped up on some particular specialty when I hated them all. It’s not all doom and gloom, though. If the cards that were dealt to me were any different, I might not be where I am today.
HOOVER: “I’m doing something now that I absolutely love, making great money, and have more freedom than I ever dreamed was possible. I am truly “living the dream.””
Hoover, what are you doing now? (Sorry if it’s posted in some obvious place.) I am a first year and I’m already thinking of careers other than practice or research…
Bob, I haven’t really talked about what I’m doing formally on this blog, but I started a company and have been working hard building it up.
It’s really doing well now, but it doesn’t have anything to do with medicine. Throughout medical school, I focused on learning a lot of tech-related stuff and then I used that knowledge to launch my business.
I’ve always felt “natural” in business, and I absolutely love tech-related stuff, so I felt that it was the obvious way for me to go.
so does everyone hate med school as much as the people on this site do? im thinking pretty seriously about med school… and it seems like the right thing to do– do most people decided that theyve made the wrong choice?
No, most think they have made the right choice but much of this is simple rationalization. It is hard for most people to admit, even to themselves, that they have made a terrible choice and have wasted huge amounts of time, effort, and money to get to the point they are at. Also, everyone thinks things will get better the farther they are in and they just keep hoping and hoping. So the answer is basically unknowable but I will say that everyone says that med school sucks at one time or another during thier stay.
I stuck it out, did a residency, practiced for a while and was still miserable. The trouble is that medical education is next to worthless outside of medicine. Going into something else takes a lot of courage. But in my case it was way worth it.
My friends who are still in practice are working more and more for less and less. Reforms are promised, as they have been for 20 years. Never seem to get here.
But if you’re in med school, do finish. I’d even say get licensed, but don’t waste any more time and effort hoping you’ll like it more down the road. Practice gets very old, very fast.
Marianne, if you can get people to be honest, I’d say at least half of 4th year med students regret having started. And far too many stay in the profession not for a love of the work, but because they are too old and too indebted to start over in something else, or at least think they are.
For the time and effort it takes, the pay isn’t great and life is dodgy at best. You can try the non-patient care specialties — derm, radiology, opth, stuff like that. You’ll have work and get to wear a white coat. And avoid primary care at all costs.
But my experience has been people who set out to go into those parts of medicine don’t really want to be doctors to begin with, which is good because they often aren’t good at it. Better they go off where nobody gets hurt. You can see this in action when the radiologist sprints out of the room when a patient arrests. It would be funny if it weren’t so pitiful.
With so many great opportunities outside of medicine I can’t imagine why anyone should put up with all the stuff that comes with it. But I am glad people do. If nobody did, ethically I’d have to go back into practice after working so hard to get out.
But if you want it badly enough that’s where you have to go.
Hoover and others who have left comments, I really appreciate you writing about your struggles in medical school. It’s hard to find others that understand or are brave enough to talk about this.
Your story sounds very similar to mine. However, I wanted to provide my experience and get some advice since I am now in my intern year of a residency that I felt was the “lesser of the evils.”
After struggling through medical school for over 5 years – taking a leave of absence during my 3rd year and then spreading my 4th year to over 1.5 years – I finally graduated. Like you recommend, I looked at alternative careers. During my 4th year, by taking “atypical” rotations, I discovered I wanted to work internationally with developing nations through population-based medicine (public health). So, I did a fellowship two summers ago working in Geneva, Switzerland, and taking classes at the WHO.
Through this experience, I learned that I did truly like public health, but to advance to the level I want to do, I need at least a MPH or board certification in a primary care specialty. So, I applied last year for a transitional year internship (basically like 3rd year med school with much more responsibility), thinking I would could then get licensed and get my MPH. Unfortunately, these are very competitive programs, and I had to scramble. I eventually matched at my current program in Family Medicine.
Residency is challenging for anyone, but especially for someone who has the constant voice saying: “I really do not want to do this in my life.” My first 6 months of intern year, I did all inpatient months with every 4th night call. Again, I fell into a very deep depression, but I pushed through until of my attendings noticed that I was working very slowly and having difficulty focusing and answering questions. My residency director pulled me out of this rotation and recommended I take some time off. So, I did take about a month off. I just returned to work on Monday and was on call the very next day.
But, I still have the lingering question of should I stay in this current path or should I change? Am I too late into this path to get out? Many have told me, I just need to push through, and then do what I truly want to do. But, I am not sure I can. Plus, I have been doing this most of my life and I am getting frustrated.
Any advice?
In 4th year medicine and on the brink of dropping out.
maybe someone can enlighten me so I don’t make the worst decision of my life.
I have always been interested in business and for the past 2 years of a six year medical course I have been debating whether I want to leave and start up my own business or not. Now I have been presented with a business opportunity – no sure success – but that I have to act on now or else it will pass me by.
I don’t feel like waiting the 2 years so that I may have something to fall back on as that is expecting failure, maybe burning my boats is the answer so that when the going gets tough I don’t retreat to my medical degree. many business men went through alot of hardship and rejection till they succeeded. having that alternative there will only serve to reduce what I am willing to go through.
when it all goes belly up I might say to myself, well you tried and it just wasn’t meant to be so back to being plan B. but what if I couldn’t fail and that I had to keep going and changing your course until you succeeded.
no one can tell me to make such a decision, especially my unsuccessful parents who see medicine as a world above what they might have hoped for. also my dad dropped out of an accounting course and paid for it his whole life
I dislike medicine for making my decision that much harder to make. I also view it as a boring limited life. I envy my classmates for their fascination and curiosity with the subject but for me it’s all just a chore.
I have thought about maybe the disfunction is in me and not in the outside world as eastern philosophy might suggest, but they would also say life is a daring gamble or nothing.
The how to get rich by felix dennis really has affected me and if any of you feel the same way as me I recommend you check out the book especially the last chapter and the first chapter. i hope this is relevant to some people and would love some feedback. I hope you didn’t find this too rambling. steven
realsb I like your comment. I echo your sentiments completely. I too have much more interest in business. I also have 2 years left of med school–the clinical years. That’s an interesting notion you bring up about leaving medicine as a fallback option vs not having it there. I think medicine is limited as well. Business opens up a world of opportunities. I don’t want to go home and have to study medicine for the next many years of my life. I think I’m going to take a LOA and find a way to escape this path. Even Radiology, which my family pushes for, is not something I want to be in.
This is an incredibly good blog. I haven’t yet started med school, but I start this year and I have been worried what to do if I all of a sudden find out that I hate it when I get to the rotations.
Thanks for the comments.
=)
would you still hold your advice for a first year who has so far only finished one semester? i am planning on dropping out and letting them know over holiday break.
AB, after first semester I’d say it is safe to get out. You’ve invested minimally in both time and money at this point. Get out while the getting is good IMO.
AB,
If you’re a first year med student who’s having second thoughts, get out now. I’ve been practicing in Ob/GYN and now GYN-only for almost 8 years and I’m practically trapped in it even though I’m back in school getting an MPH and have a part-time clinical job already set up in order to pay the bills because in my attempts to do everything possible to make this work I opened my own practice thinking maybe if I was calling the shots it would be better. All that’s done is make all the responsibility fall on me. In order to be covered by malpractice insurance if I quit I’ll have to pay $66,000 so I’m considering not being covered and taking my chances. I also owe the bank $100,000. This is all much more than the $76,000 in student loans that I was so worried about that made me not quit my first day of residency when I really should have. I’m now considering bankruptcy and don’t know what will happen, so I would give anything to be back in my first year of med school and have the opportunity to quit while the quitting’s good.
Can all of you who are so disillusioned with medicine that you want to quit spell out for me why? Looking from the outside, it sounds like a good career.
Amy,
It’s a ton of work/investment for little return. I’m still in training, but luckily doing a fellowship in something that brings in the money. And don’t think I started this with money on the brain, that was (SERIOUSLY) the furthest thing from my mind, at that time I would have been happy with the 50K residents get.
My perspective really changed once I hit internship. All the hard work, the sacrifices (family, personal), everything. I’m now a 32 year-old woman about to divorce (not b/c of medicine though), will be 33 when I’m done with all my training. No children, likely won’t have any b/c I’m too old and don’t want to risk my kid’s health.
It sucks. But what would I have done other than medicine? Nothing. As painful, tiring, horrible as it’s been, I can’t imagine what else I would have done and been happy with. I still love to see patients, even now. But I think I’m the exception and not the rule, even in my subspecialty.
I think if you can work your butt off (and you WILL have to, med school is no picnic), and get into a high-paying subspecialty, then you’re good.
Because it’s just NOT cool to not feel like all your work was not worth it, that “they” don’t care about you and paying you for what you’re worth. (”they” meaning whoever pays you)
Nobody likes feeling undervalued and underappreciated. And you do in medicine.
Hey, I am half way through my second year. I have just confronted myself about not being sure of medical school. My first year was a competitive year for entry. Before that, when I left school, I was planning on pursuing arts papers and becoming a journalist. I never got the chance to find out if I would have suited that, instead I decided to go for medical school and not look back….until now. I am going through the most painful decision making process of my life and I only have 2 more weeks before second semester commences. If I get out now I can transfer half a years worth of work to an art degree, finish out the year with a 1st year of an arts degree (politics and international relations) completed, and then take up law next year. That way I would only have lost a year (plus $20,000). What spurred this was a sudden realisation that I was only going to learn about the human body for the rest of my life. That hit me like a ton of bricks. I don’t even know who fought in the Gulf war! And I love to write….hence the interest in journalis. But I have always been split between science and arts….physics and english were my best subjects at school. Do I jump off the boat and shake up my life entirely? I know that once I do, I can never go back….thoughts?
Emma,
Get out of it while you can. I’m now in 4th year, and I tell you, those 4 years are the worst in my whole life. I live in pain every day, and unhappy ever since I joined medicine. My interest has always been in Physics, but I got pulled by medicine back then without knowing the life after getting the M.D.. I’ve always been split between the two. It’s been killing me. My body feels like it’s rotting bit by bit every day.
Follow your passion and it’ll get you somewhere somehow. As for me, I’m stuck with it bitterly for the rest of my life. You can still make it.
This post and comments makes me feel so much better. I’m studying in the UK and just started my final year; I nearly dropped out twice, at the beginning of clinical rotations and again this time last year. At this point I would feel it was a complete waste if I didn’t at least finish my final year, but I’m dreading internship. I really don’t want to work in the field, ever, not even to get registered and finally earn some money. Even though other people complain about the course, no one seems to loathe it as much as I do. So it’s good to feel I’m not alone in my deepest hate! Hopefully surfing this blog and links will give me some ideas about what I could do when I have my degree instead of going straight into a life of work I dread.
Wow! I never knew this site existed. This will surely allow people to be more confident about their decisions (either way) and not feel so isolated.
I quit medicine after first year in 2007. I was a pharmacist previously, never really liked it, and thought moving up the food chain might help. Turns out it was kind of like jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire. I spent the whole year reading text books cover to cover because I loved the theory, but i had (and still dont have) any tolerance for clinical skills. One thing I learnt in my month long end of year surgical rotation is that when you are a specialist you have seen and done it all a million times, which makes it a bit boring. I was sick to death of appendicectomies after a month, a MONTH!!
I didn’t like the hierarchy of medicine either. My experience was that it was didactic and it was difficult to question the decisions of “the elders”.
Im an entrepreneur now, and things are just lifting off the ground now (or so it seems!?!). Up until now it has been extremely hard to try and capitalize on ideas in the real world. I def. would have more security if I had stayed in medicine and I don’t think that should be discounted because when you are in debt with low or unstable income it reduces quality of life.
I wont be surprised at all if in 50 years I will still say it was the hardest decision of my life. I just hope I say it with a smile on my face!
I could go on and on….
This comment is for Hoover. Thank you so much for making it OK to discuss the concept of not loving medicine. I was accepted to an 8-year combined degree program from high school. This essentially meant that I was guaranteed a spot in medical school if I met certain requirements through college. I was not at all sure whether or not I wanted to be a doctor, but it seemed like the “secure” path to follow, and with two-MD parents, it was not that easy to turn it down.
College was great; I majored in Biology and Spanish, and the latter lit up my life. I have always been in love with the humanities. Sciences are a struggle for me, and I don’t relate to them easily. But, since medical school was already waiting for me, I figured I should continue with the program (I didn’t really know what else to do).
Medical school, as this site so aptly calls it, has been hell. I have kept my liberal arts-side alive through starting a ballroom dance club, and practicing my Spanish on the side. But it hasn’t been enough to keep me truly happy. Furthermore, I am sick of being surrounded by overly-competitive, and sometimes cold, people. I empathize with many people that have submitted comments here. Many people complain, so you try to tell yourself that this is normal. But in your heart, you know that this kind of misery cannot be normal, and you don’t know why you should have to accept it.
Hoover, your advice seems very sound, but I have a few questions for you, if you don’t mind.
1) I am a 4th year, and have already done my subI in pediatrics, and I am taking Step 2 Sept. 25. My advising dean suggested that I should take time off now due to my doubts, but I’m a little scared that I will never come back to this if I leave now. That being said, I am also scared of matching; writing a convincing personal statement and interviewing is going to be difficult to due in a genuine manner. Furthermore, matching commits me to three more years of hell. Any suggestions as to what I should do?
2) I think I may have had less doubts of becoming a doctor if I had truly made this decision on my own, and fought to get here. I’m always wondering if I missed my calling. I will be honest; sometimes I think I can’t leave, because how can I turn my back on helping others? But that being said, there are many ways to help others without being a doctor. I also fear that due to my lack of passion for the sciences, I will not be as up-to-date as I should be to do the best job for my patients. Sorry; I’m rambling. I’m kind of wondering if there is way to really incorporate the humanities into my daily practice? Any particular “alternative specialties” that you would recommend? It’s so frustrating having to change the way I think, and to package myself a certain way, to get a career I’m not even sure I want.
3) Congrats, and much respect, for having the courage and insight to pursue your own dreams. And thank you again, for writing about it.
I’m sorry for the length of this post, but I’m verbose by nature. I would appreciate any suggestions you, or any others may have. I’m kind of pressed for time; I need to decide in the next few weeks if I should take a year off, or match!
SKgirl, I feel your pain.
I was clinically depressed in medical school. I never felt it was my decision because it was something my parents (MD, and wanna-be MD) told me I would do since I was in grade school. Not having any strong feelings against it, I went along with it. I discovered Philosophy in high school and found I loved it. My parents ‘tolerated’ me getting my BA in Philosophy as long as I finished my pre-med requirements. I also sucked at the sciences, flunking in high school, failing and retaking pre-med courses over and over. I barely got through Biochemistry in med school. I was so miserable, I was failing the USMLEs as well – I think mostly as a self-sabotaging psychological mechanism (twice failing by one point). SSRIs got me through graduation, but it’s been 1.5 years since then. I haven’t done too much with that time other than recover from that hell, but the reality of this position sucks.
I’d love to maybe go and get a PhD in Philosophy and maybe work in bioethics, but the idea of slogging through so many years on little to no pay while still having undergrad and med school debt is daunting. Plus, the options for an unlicensed MD is minimal, unless you’re interested in scientific research (not the humanities like us). I hate it, and the idea almost gives me panic attacks, but I’m contemplating going back for residency just to tie up those medical loose ends. Because you pretty much have to be board certified (or at least licensed, which you won’t get unless you do an internship) or else be willing to essentially burn the medical bridge and start anew as if medical school had never happened. It’s like starting from you BA/BS, like those 4 years of hell never happened. And that’s intimidating, to let those years go COMPLETELY to waste. So I’m thinking about getting licensed, maybe work for a year or two to chip away at some of my debt, then getting the hell out of dodge and starting anew. That’s the hope, anyway. Unless the residency I’m thinking of (pathology) is suddenly entertaining enough to keep working there, I think life is too short to commit to a life-long career you’ve known you disliked from the beginning. I think Hoover is right – the important part is finding something tolerable. And if I do this residency, it could be ranked lowest, I don’t care – I don’t want prestige, I just want to tie up this loose end and move on with my life. I figure I toughed it out for 4 years & had a couple years break, I can surely manage another 1-3 years… maybe if I prophylactically take SSRIs beforehand
Btw, I don’t know what you wound up doing since you posted over a month ago, but I’d suggest taking some time off. It was invaluable to me in terms of recovery, and I don’t care what anyone says about it. If you’re already in match and get accepted, see about possible deferment for a year – I think I heard of some students doing that. Say you want to do some research for a while or something. Yes, I’ve definitely heard of students doing that, particularly when it’s a couple where one is younger than the other; the older one spins his/her wheels doing something else for a year and then they try for a Couples Match.
Good luck to you, whatever you decide!
It’s good to know that I am not the only one having thoughts about quitting medical school.
My case is a bit different since I am studying in the UK, and I got a BA after the first 3 years of preclinical. I have started my clinical, but am really not enjoying it as much as I like. It’s really difficult when people around you are so enthusiastic and passionate about medicine, and you kinda feel left alone not liking it. It’s also very difficult to talk to tutors about it, since most of them are doctors and they would think that their job is the best job in the world.
The other thing is that I am an overseas student and with the workload that we have at medical school, it’s sometimes really tough when your family is not around supporting you.
I am thinking about finishing this year and apply for MPH or an MSc in international health management, but I don’t know if that is wise all not, SO I REALLY HOPE YOU GUYS CAN GIVE ME SOME ADVICE. My parents are really supportive of my own decision as long as I have a legitimate reason for it, but at the same time I don’t want to disappoint them. I also thought about finishing the clinical years and perhaps then work in the healthcare/pharmaceutical industries, so it would be helpful if anyone could tell me what are the careers prospects for someone with an MD to work in those industries.
Thanks!!!
Hey Hoover, you sound almost identical to me. I choose Medical School because I was afraid of not being able to make it in other fields.
I too like you, enjoy tech stuff and I’m always on Cnet looking at the latest gadgets (my favorite tech items are gadgets) Cnet reviewers seem to have a dream job but I don’t think I could get to where they’re at.
So what do you suggest I do? I’m an M1 and I COULD get out if I wanted to, but then I have no idea what kind of degree I’d get. I’m at an international school so I don’t have an undergrad degree, though I’m still only 19 and I could get a degree in something tech related. But I’ve never really been good at math and it seems like to go into computers
Hi, I’m in the 1st year of medical school, and lately i’ve been having doubts. I always liked interesting stuff, so when I had to choose a path. I said medicine would be interesting. My parents who have a business supported me. I have a place to stay and everything.
But now, seeing the amount of work you put in…. and when i think that 6 more years await me, scare the hell out of me ( I live in Romania, here medical school is 6 years (3+3), after which you go into residency).
In highschool I studied pretty well, maybe the biggest problem is that I studied pretty much everything, so when I had to choose a career I was a bit confused.
Now, when I presented my doubts to my parents they were furious. I thought they would maybe, even be a bit happy, I may have thought maybe I could work in the family business. The thing is, that in this country, doctors have an image of beeing from another world.
I was pretty good at math, and english (i got a CAE degree). And I’ve got a feeling that chemistry is going to kill me in med school.
I’m really confused, these past 2 months I’v been thinking of several jobs or paths to take just to get away from this. I really don’t know. In highschool I wanted to get away from mindless book learning, cover to cover, and thought that a photographic memory can be useful in some places like anatomy. But now I see that you have to put you butt down and learn a lot.
Now, I do not want to make a decision that I will regret later on, wether that is staying in med school or quiting it. Furthermore, I don’t know that are these thoughts coming to me because it’s laziness getting to me, or my innerself signaling. I too thought about what is my calling, and things like these, and don’t know what to do.
Any opinions ?
Glad to see I’m not the only one….Due to health reasons I had to take a LOA for a year, and they MADE me take another year of LOA. All this time has given me time to rethink my career goals and let me tell you that I’m not gun-ho about medicine anymore. And this is coming from somebody that almost finished medschool in another country, and I finished my MSII here in the US. I have a $hitload of loans to pay back but I am having SERIOUS doubts about going back. Actually, I don’t want to go back. It’s not worth it in the end. I was even “adviced” to take yet another year and of course, I would have to reapply to return to medschool. And I rather shoot myself in the foot than doing that again. So now I’m trying to get a job in research, get experience, and probably get into a PhD program. It sickens me, trust me, to be in this situation, I’m in my 30’s already and I spent so much time, money and mental sanity in medical school. So I don’t think I would regret not going back, I’ve had plenty of time to think about it. I still have a few more months before I “technically” have to return (provided they clear me medically), so I don’t give a $hit anymore. Medical school sucked the life out of me, my marriage (now a divorce), my sanity, and my financed. God only knows how I’m gonna pay back those loans but I’m sure as hell I’ll be a happier person and HAVE A LIFE. Good luck to all of you trying to get through it and sucking it up, I admire you. But as far as I’m concerned, I AM DONE.
By the way, I’m already planning my “career change” (if I ever had a f*ng career…) and I feel this huge sense of relief. Applied to a bunch of research jobs today, started looking at graduate programs (just for the fun of it, oh California….I see myself there next year
Not kidding, my boyfriend is moving back there at the end of this year and is gonna wait for me).
I just want to work for a couple of years and live life like a “normal” person, might get the PhD (or Masters or none), who knows… I just know that I actually have this feeling, oh man, what is that? dude, this is new! oh yeah! I forgot how it felt! I’m friggin feeling HAPPY! LOL.
People, you know, the light at the end of the tunel might be the incoming train, or it might just be that, the light at the end of the tunnel.