You’re pissed off at an attending surgeon in the OR. Which, frankly, could be all the time. To heck with a potential illustrious career in medicine, time to get even! Some possibilities*:
- Secretly deglove and hand the surgeon a retractor with your bare hand. Mention that your hands were uncomfortable since they don’t stock an 8.375 glove size.
- Walk into the OR while eating a piece of fried chicken. You had no breakfast, and it’s lunchtime, so you have a right to eat. Be firm.
- Remove your facemask and accidently sneeze/cough/spit on the surgeon’s hands right after he gloves.
- Unplug the bovie machine when the surgeon least expects it. Laugh and tell him to lighten up…you’re just foolin’.
- Descrub during an important part of an afternoon surgery, and tell the surgeon you just remembered your dog needs his midday doggie treat.
- While the surgeon is putting on scrubs, remove your gloves and try to touch everything that is sterile.
- During the surgery, push on the instrument table lever so it falls. The louder, the better. Chuckle as the scrub tech tries to reassemble everything that’s still sterile.
*This is satire, for all of you easily offended people. Keeping a patientâ€ sterile and safe during surgery is of the utmost importance.
â€ Unless it was a patient who was also a surgeonâ€¡.