I found this post at SDN today and this newly-minted MD already thinks he walks on water. Sadly, you will most likely come into contact with someone like this at some point during your medical training. He seems to think it is his duty to tell MSIIIs how to act on the wards. It is guys like this that turn into shitty residents and asshole attendings should they choose to stay in academic medicine.

I had a couple of interns like this on some of my 3rd year rotations. No, we didn’t get along. Respect is a two-way street. They tried to make my life hell but due to my motto, C=MD, I could care less. Instead, I turned their games around on them and made their days that much more difficult. My favorite would be to intentionally leave them out of the loop so that they had to gather data or find some tidbit of information themselves. If they were too busy to do this, I would always make it a point to ask them about it in front of the team during rounds. Fun times.

Anyway, here’s this asshole’s post:

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Match day has come and gone and I have to say that I was pretty surprised at the number of my classmates that entered surgery. I cannot fathom what makes these people want a lifetime of being overstressed and overworked. Is it the fascination with cutting and looking at the open abdomen? Is it the long 14-hour days of wallowing in crap that get you pumped? How about not having a lunchbreak…ever?

Whatever it is, I’d like to know. “To cut is to cure” as they say. Yeah, curing the patient maybe. But what about your own health? These guys oftentimes cannot find time to eat, let alone go to the gym or otherwise promote some form of a healthy lifestyle. Honestly, I believe that surgeons are some of the most out of shape people I’ve ever seen.

The “training” process begins in the 3rd year of medical school, where they get you “used” to the long hours. Then comes residency where you are required to live at the hospital with three to four days off per month at best. By the time these guys are done with training, they’ve forgotten what it’s like to live a normal life and have a decent sleep schedule. By this time, it’s all over. You fit the mold. You’re a surgeon.

It’s no wonder the burnout rate is so high. Everyday you run the risk of being exposed to some form of infectious disease. Everyday you must dodge feces, blood and urine in order to accomplish your normal tasks. Everyday you stand for hours on end.

Clinic, OR, clinic, OR, more clinic, more OR.

Eat when you can, sleep when you can, shit when you can.

Don’t fuck with the pancreas.

It never ends.

“Surgeons are overtrained, glorified mechanics. I’d rather have grease than blood on my hands.”

The question most every 4th-year medical student waits for. For those of you not aware, this is actually the subject of the email that you receive on the Monday of match week. The email is opened with anticipation and hopes of not having to attend the “I-Didn’t-Match-So-I-Have-To-Scramble” meeting. The location of your residence for the next 3-5 years is not disclosed at this time – this tidbit of information is held until this upcoming Thursday, March 16 AKA “Match Day.”

All of my classmates received the “Did I Match” email yesterday. There’s already word traveling through the grapevine of who didn’t match. Of course, I didn’t match. Hell, I didn’t even sign up. Those fuckers aren’t getting the next 3-5 years of my life.

Along with the rumors of who will be scrambling, I overheard that a particular gunner in my class who’s trying to match a competitive specialty didn’t succeed this go-around. Oops. Just goes to show you that having top board scores and grades won’t guarantee you a spot in this fucked up NRMP crap.

What’s most humerous about this situation is that this same gunner once told me that “it sucks to be you” after I got my ass handed to me on an exam during first year. Well Mr. Gunner, have fun doing prostate exams while I’m flying business first-class to Paris.

Not to keep score or anything, but…

Me = 1
People who scramble for internal medicine slots = 0

pwned